Bride of FrankensteinAwful Plastic Surgery Made These "Average Joes" Famous
Published: Friday, August 24, 2007 - 16:46
Want to be famous? Let's see...you could post a YouTube video of you reciting Lady Macbeth's soliloquy in a bikini, streak naked down the 50-yard line during the Superbowl, or maybe even try to out-Sanjaya Sanjaya. Or, you could do what these "average Joes" did and just spend a fortune on countless extreme plastic surgeries that'll turn you into a walking Frankenstein. From cat ladies to real-life Ken dolls, these regular folks' bizarre plastic surgery obsession has earned them notoriety, jaw-dropping doctors' bills, and faces that only Joan Rivers could love.
Jocelyn WildensteinJocelyn Wildenstein
When it comes to keeping their man happy, a lot of women would call it a day after a bikini wax, some nookie, and back-to-back episodes of "SportsCenter." For Swiss-born New York socialite Jocelyn Wildenstein, something a tad more drastic seemed appropriate. Inspired by her husband's fascination with the lions and other fab felines he encountered in Kenya, Jocelyn endured multiple surgeries-silicone injections in the lips, cheeks, and chin; a facelift; eye reconstruction; and more-to make her the cat's meow. According to Dr. Anthony Youn's CelebrityCosmeticSurgery.blogspot.com, "Her surgeon has overdone these procedures, creating vastly exaggerated results. This is also not anti-aging surgery, but facial-deforming surgery in my opinion." It's rumored that "The Bride of Wildenstein" has spent over three million dollars on her fixation, but even that didn't stop her hubby from divorcing her.
Jenny Lee
Jenny Lee
Austin housewife/aspiring actress Jenny Lee cites body dysmorphic disorder as the impetus behind the approximately 30 (and counting) cosmetic procedures she's undergone, including rhinoplasty, a lower eyelid lift, brow lift, Botox, liposuction, a full body lift, veneers, and breast, cheek, and lip implants-hey, everything is bigger in Texas. Jenny once offered CNN's Larry King this gnarly insight: "People don't realize how much they could appreciate taking a tissue and wrapping it around their finger and sticking it up their nose and being able to clean their nose out and I can't do that and so I have to take Q-tips everywhere I go so that I make sure that I can breathe out of my nose. Otherwise, I can only breathe out of my mouth. And I can't blow my nose because then, you know, it's a lot of blood and then it's stuck up all in there and I can't get it out and it's just a nightmare." Tell us about it, Jenny. Despite seeking therapy for her body issues, Jenny told TheInsiderOnline.com that "I'm a grown adult making my own decisions and I don't want anyone trying to tell me what to do."
Oh, and to any casting agents out there: Jenny-who lists winning an Oscar or Emmy as an objective on her personal website, TheJennyLee.com, and credits motorcycle riding as a job skill-is willing to alter her appearance, provided it's for a paid role in a feature film.
Steve ErhardtSteve Erhardt
A life-size Ken doll (provided it's anatomically correct, of course) sounds nice, right, girls? Mmmm, maybe not. Los Angeles hairdresser has gained fame as the "Human Ken Doll" thanks to more than 30 surgeries and a quarter of a million dollars spent. Rhinoplasty, eye work, implants in his chin, cleft, pec, butt, and biceps, abdominal sculpting, liposuction-Steve's done it all, to eerily plastic effect. ETonline.com has reported that Steve sought out Michael Jackson's surgeon for his rhinoplasty (never a good idea), and thinks that he looks like a cross between Patrick Swayze and David Hasselhoff. In a 2006 interview on CNN's "Larry King Live" he said, "I never really wanted a natural look. That's not what I was trying to achieve. I wanted something kind of over the top." I guess congratulations are in order then-mission completed, Steve!
Cindy JacksonCindy Jackson
Ken, meet Barbie. Cindy Jackson's obsession with looking like America's sweetheart earned the Ohio-born London resident the Guinness World Record for the most cosmetic procedures, and a career as a plastic surgery expert and author (she should know, right?). According to CosmeticSurgeryInsider.net, the Ohio-born London resident's surgical resume includes "three 'mini' face lifts, one full face lift, three separate eyelid surgeries, an upper lip lift, liposuction to her jaw line, waist, knees, abdomen and thighs; two nose operations, cheek implants, bottom lip implant, chin reduction, hair transplantation to cover up face lift scars, breast augmentation, breast implant removal, two dermabrasions, two chemical peels, two laser resurfacings, mole removal, vein removal, and permanent make-up procedures to her eyebrows, eyes and lips." Yeah, but does she have a Barbie Dream House and a closet full of plastic heels?
Cindy lists her original plastic surgery wish list and photos of her changing appearance on her personal website, CindyJackson.com.
Miles Kendall
Miles Kendall
Thought the world wasn't big enough for two Ken doll wannabes? Think again. Brit Miles Kendall-pal of Cindy Jackson-underwent two major operations that entailed rhinoplasty; a full face lift; chin, eye, cheek, and lip enhancement; lateral brow lift; cosmetic dentistry; and liposculpture. Since then, he's palled around with British pop stars and been featured on programs like "The Weakest Link" and "The Ricki Lake Show." Miles-who maintains a website, MilesKendall.moonfruit.com, as well as his good looks-clearly relishes his new life, as evidenced by this blog post: "Do I regret my make-over? Errr.... NO!! My life is so much more enriched because of it." To be fair, 39-year-old Miles does look better post-surgery, and compared to Steve Erhardt, he seems downright harmless.
Igor and Grichka BogdanoffIgor and Grichka Bogdanoff
Okay, technically these twin brothers were known in France for their sci-fi TV shows back in the day...and they're also part of a scientific hoax related to the Big Bang (zzzz), but if you're not French or a geek, you'd only know these boys based on their jaw-dropping (literally) plastic surgery. Based on photos from their website, Bogdanov.ch, these bros actually weren't bad-looking. A couple of cheek and chin implants later, they look like the love children of Jay Leno and that Madame puppet.
OrlanOrlan
Before Orlan, the closest any artist had come to plastic surgery was van Gogh's severed ear. Using her body as the ultimate canvas, this French performance artist has gained a cult following for her constant use of plastic surgeries to transform herself into a living work of art. According to the University of California at Santa Barbara English department, "The operating room is Orlan's atelier. And what a surreal theatre it is. Each of her 'performances' is carefully choreographed. Famous designers, such as Paco Rabanne and Issey Miyake, have designed costumes for Orlan to wear during the surgeries. Poetry is read and music is played while she lies on the operating table fully conscious of the events taking place (only local anesthetic is used). Each surgery has been captured on video...and exhibited in a number of galleries in Europe and the U.S." One such surgery-described on Orlan.net-involved having lumps of silicone placed on each side of her forehead. Whatever happened to good ol' painting?
Sarah BurgeSarah Burge
According to StyleDash.com, 46-year-old Sarah Burge has spent more than 350,000 US dollars on cosmetic surgery over the past 40-years. The long list of procedures Burge reports to have undergone include several face-lifts, multiple liposuction treatments, a nose job, breast augmentation, and facial implants. "I'm as plastic as Barbie," exclaims Ms. Burge, "and I love it!"
Yep, I'm sure Burge's kids are real proud of their mama's assets. I just hope, for legal reasons, they prefer playing with stuffed animals. RealLifeBarbie.com, Sarah Burge's website, includes a photo gallery of Big Girl Barbie wearing outfits that would probably run a little small even on the original. These "art" pics range in price from 10-20 dollars. Widely considered to be the world's first TV ambassador for cosmetic surgery, Burge also advertises her plastic surgery consulting services to those want to feel worthy of renting a room in Barbie's Dream House. "I'm proud of the lifestyle decision I have made," Burge explains, "and prouder still of the results. And I would love it if my experiences encouraged other women to follow in my footsteps."
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